4w1d?

Yesterday I had blood drawn and then just asked for the nurse to leave a message. BIG MISTAKE. What she said made me worry! And I have not worried at all until then. I kept thinking that what will be, will be. But when she called she said "It is positive, I'll call you tomorrow to make a plan, but it is positive." Make a plan? What plan? Why? What's wrong? When I called back to maybe discuss things the place was closed.
So I called this morning, and she told me HCG is in the mid 300's and the progesterone was low so they want me on Crinone.. which I was on with Addison. I am really hoping this will help. And that no other problems will arise.
I go for more blood on saturday. And I am getting crinone samples so I don't have to buy it just yet. For now I am just using my leftover from Addison.

3w6d? 4w?

Betas tomorrow...
And I am going in my pj's since its pj day tomorrow at work. WOO!

Well then...

... turns out J and I have no restraint when it comes to trying to avoid. Last month with our chemical we decided to wait on trying again until May while losing some weight and saving up money to pay for the RPL work up. Well, I've been on a diet for a month today, and lost 16 lbs! 

Then tonight I had a feeling and took a test, and it was positive!! I will glady gain those 16lbs back as long as this is my take home baby!! At least I know what diet to do when its time to lose weight again. 

Tonight I tested, did not tell J because he was asleep and was going to head off to work in about a half hr. While waiting to look at the test, I prayed, I said that no matter what the outcome I will understand, trust, and move forward. After all this is all part of HIS plan! I noticed the time was up, went in to see the test and was shocked to see two lines. So I just took the test, woke up J, gave him time to realize I needed to tell him something. Then just said, "I'm pregnant." His eyes bugged out and we cried. I kept telling him that I am scared. Happy, but scared. 

We talked and I told him that I don't need to rush to my DR for betas, no driving an hr away just so I get the beta results faster. I can get them done at a quest down the street, and just wait for the betas. I am in NO RUSH. This will be what it will be. 

Today I am pregnant, and I love my baby. 

Oh and I have not done any prenatal care of any sort since the chemical, so I popped some of those and took my first bit of blood thinners. 

CD 19.. Nothing to do.

I kind of sucks knowing that I am ovulating and not being able to do anything about it. Not just because  my DR wants to do tests, but also for fear that if we were to get pregnant again that I would just lose another baby. And I'll be honest, I am not a fan of gender friendly names. I think we got some good ones with Addison and Avery. I am just not cut out for naming a non gender specific child.. But I personally feel bad for sending my baby up to Heaven with no name. To me it's like I'm sending my child off to their first day of school without the listed school supplies. Don't judge!

On a different note.. J and I got our first phone call for foster care... too bad it was for a 16 yr old boy and we are just not ready to take in a teen. I can't wait for the phone call that we can say yes to!